Most walk through life thinking we’re something we’re not. For the most part, that something is better, stronger, more worthy of something we don’t have and don’t deserve.
We tell ourselves stories about who we are, stories that are out of line with reality. We dream about killing the bad guys when in reality we’d run away like the rest of the cowards in a culture that breeds cowardice.
That’s the main focus of this article, the culture that breeds cowardice.
Many of you have been led to believe that you’re a victim, when you’re not. You’ve been told, nay, force fed this narrative that someone owes you something, that you’ve started at a disadvantage that, because of a different pigment or a different income or a different set of talents, you’re starting life with one hand tied behind your back.
You aren’t. And even if you were, the best among us would see the challenge, lick their chops, and continue on.
If you’ve read this far and you’re not crying or running to your safe space, please continue to read. In identifying how we’re all becoming little bitches in one way or another we can identify the enemy, which is a necessary step in defeating it.
1. You utter the words, ‘I wish’.
There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.
That quote is by a man named Epictetus.
You may know that he’s a Stoic philosopher or that he advised emperors and trained the sons of Rome’s elite, but did you know he was always born a slave?
How can a man who was born into a role in life that many of us would deem victimhood not be a victim?
We see the same with men like James Stockdale, the fighter pilot who spent almost 8 years as a prisoner of war in Vietnam’s prison camps, 3 years of which in solitary confinement. How he didn’t go mad is beyond me, but how he didn’t blame the world for his misfortunes is very clear, he wasn’t a little bitch. (Read This: Stop Being Such a Little Bitch)
Both he and Epictetus and Socrates and Machiavelli and others who’ve spent time in captivity but never relinquished what they have control over are a far cry from the norm. No matter the situation we’re in we have no excuse to be victims. We have no reason other than weakness to utter the words ‘I wish’, because a wish is ignorance of reality and a man who doesn’t have a firm grasp on what it real has no control.
Those men, although they were beaten and sometimes tortured knew that in every instance, even while they were being tortured, they had some form of control over the situation.
As Stockdale put it (and I’m paraphrasing), how can they stop you from taking their punishment?
Brilliant.
2. You think that rich people are swindlers.
The stats behind self-made and inherited uber wealth (billionaires) ranges from either 40% or 70% are self-made. People love to complain about the lack of opportunity they have. They love to say, ‘if I had that guy’s money I’d be doing so much more.”
Those numbers make this mindset plain stupid. From the other angle, if you’re making $30,000 per year, you’re in the 1% of income earners worldwide.
To sake such a selfish, cowardly stance on wealth, where you make excuses for your failures while taking no command over your life is pure weakness. It’s victimhood.
Now, forget about wealth and think about success. To many, success requires overcoming obstacles. The man on the rise will not be dissuaded by objects blocking his path.
When you see those who’ve earned a lot of money purely as cheaters because they’ve done what you haven’t, you cheapen their success in your own mind, creating an excuse not to work because there is no point of working if everyone’s simply going to cheat.
This cloud of envy and ignorance will hang over your head, eating away at you, preventing you from working, hustling, realizing why you’re here and what your purpose is.
Success is earned. Wealth is earned. Envy is slavery.
3. You think a degree should guarantee a job.
People complain about college and university tuition being as high as it is, ignorant to the reasons for said prices, student loans.
Take away student loans and prices will drop. Fewer people, however, will be able to attend college, which may not be such a bad thing.
University, once the beacon of free speech and differing ideas is becoming singular in its ideologies. 70% of American professors say they’re liberal. Not surprising. Those who can’t do, teach. Get into the real world of work and providing a service and you’ll run into a lot more people who are at the very least, economically conservative.
The liberal mindset feeds entitlement. When you give things that are not earned and your entire ideology is surrounded around free stuff, you can’t help but breed an entitled youth who look up to the professors pushing their ideas.
Modern liberalism isn’t classical liberalism. The classical form contains individual liberty and the right of the individual to pursue whatever it is they want in life. Accompanying liberty, your own path, your own pursuit and purpose, is almost always struggle.
The entitlement of the millennial wants to remove struggle. They want to remove road blocks and have what they have not earned. They see a job as a right because their parents paid for their education. (Read This: You Don’t Deserve Shit!)
The flaw in this thinking goes beyond weakness and cowardice and ventures into the ignorance of why we’re here. We’re here to survive. We’re here to figure our way through obstacles. We’re here to persist longer than the next guy who wilts and quits when times get tough.
We’re here to become tougher, grittier, stronger not by avoiding hardship, but through it.
The man who wants a pardon from the struggle, we feels entitled to anything for any reason, also wants a pardon from life. He wants you to pay for what he’s not willing to do.
You don’t deserve shit. You can earn it though.
4. You think you’re above certain kinds of work.
What you do, that is, what you use your talents for and the skills you try to perfect, this is a large part of why you’re here. This work that you want to avoid is a huge part of your purpose.
Research is showing that it really doesn’t matter what the work is. If you want purpose in your life, if you want to find a calling, you have to create it, you can’t wait for it, and you certainly can’t jump from job to job in pursuit of it.
In her book, Grit, Angela Duckworth explains why grit is so vital to a person’s success in life, and how to create it. She delves into the idea of finding a ‘calling’, and research – both hers and others – surrounding the topic shows that a calling isn’t so much found, but created. Often times it’s created in the last place we’d think to look.
The key for a calling is that, sure, you have to enjoy what you do, but you also have to see how it fits into and benefits a society and others around you. It cannot just be about you, there needs to be some kind of benefit to others.
Those who feel they have a calling don’t jump from job to job trying to find it. Often times they simply work, and before they know it they’re struck with the value of their work and the continual pursuit of getting better at it.
Thinking you’re above anything removes the ability to first, earn, but second, keep an open mind about what you’ll love to do and why you’re here. It puts the blinders on. It’s subscribing to what you think society will respect you for and happiness, meaning, and purpose cannot exist if they’re measured by what you think others think.
If you think you’re ‘too good’ for certain work, getting dirty, being in a position you think is lowly, you are a little bitch. You’re practicing avoidance and you’re living life not in reality, but in perception of a reality you’ve been led to believe is real.
You’re also going to be a victim, unable to learn the true value of a buck or the magic of real, dirty, hard work.
5.You feel, you don’t think.
The bleeding heart leaves little room for the functioning brain.
The world’s worst policies, be it the mass immigration in Europe or the failed War on Poverty in the States were led by a bleeding heart and are devoid of rational, pragmatic thought.
As a man, you cannot let a bleeding heart get in the way of what actually works.
This doesn’t mean you’re heartless, not in the slightest. You’re the protector, defender, and bread winner. What matters is results, not intentions, and when you let your feelings and emotions come between results and actions you’re useless.
Part of this is seeing what’s wrong and stepping back. You cannot be a victim to your emotions and still be effective. Effectiveness is king in life. Intentions mean nothing. The vast majority of us have grand intentions but never take the necessary steps to give them the effort they deserve nor the thoughtful planning that their success depends on.
Feel, by all means, but don’t be a slave to these emotions and don’t let them cloud what will truly work in life.
Turn Things Around
Being a ‘little bitch’ is essentially blaming others for anything. It’s being a victim and thinking that your victimhood is somehow not under your control and even justified.
Being a man, not a male, but an actual man in the way that men have been men, differing from their female counterparts for thousands of years, means you cannot be a victim. Manhood and victimhood don’t go together.
About The Author
Chad Howse: Chad’s mission is to get you in the arena, ‘marred by the dust and sweat and blood’, to help you set and achieve audacious goals in the face of fear, and not only build your ideal body, but the life you were meant to live. He’ll give you the kick in the ass needed to help you live a big, ambitious life.
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FAQs
How do you know if you're an alpha female? ›
Signs You're an Alpha Female
You love encouraging others to succeed because you know their success is also your success. You're confident in your abilities, even with things you're not familiar with. People often ask you for advice or help. You have an infectious personality.
An alpha female is a powerful and successful woman, often in a leadership role. Alpha females are often described as intimidating by men and women alike.
What is an alpha personality? ›“An Alpha is a leader; she is self-assured, powerful and confident in everything she does,” says Spencer. “These personality types don't hold back, tending to steer the pack in friendships and powerfully lead their teams in work.
What is an alpha female like in bed? ›1) In The Bedroom …
An alpha woman has no problem making the first move. She's used to going after what she wants. Since men are usually the first to initiate sex, dating an alpha woman who is comfortable and confident with her sexuality is a change he'll appreciate. Men love it when a woman takes the time to initiate.
The delta is similar to the beta but she is more into her finances and appearances. Some people say the delta was an alpha but bad experiences have turned her into a delta. The delta is quite reserved and self-deprecating, but she is extremely loving in the relationships and friendships she has.
What's an omega female? ›The Omega Female
1. She Is Introverted. The omega female possesses several personality traits that are very commonly seen in movie characters who appear shy and reserved, but who are also passionate and intelligent. The omega female, in most situations, would be seen as an introvert.
A strong Alpha Woman needs a man who's her equal, her partner, her greatest supporter. By definition, you'd think that she should want an Alpha Male, but he can provide only passion, not steadiness. She also doesn't get along with Beta Males because they're too weak to keep her or pique her interest.
What type of woman do alpha males like? ›Alpha males are often attracted to strong, confident, and independent women. These women know what they want and aren't afraid to go after it. These women are usually self-sufficient and don't need a man to care for them.
Who is the alpha in the relationship? ›Alpha males are the leaders in their relationships. They aren't controlling, but they are very open about what they want, and they don't wait for a potential mate to approach them. (Note that this doesn't mean his partner can't be in control of her own life.
What does an alpha male look for in a woman? ›Alpha men are attracted to their opposite: the feminine female. Alpha men love women who wear dresses, heels, and take pride in their appearance. Alpha men are also attracted to feminine personality traits. They are drawn to women who are warm, caring and nurturing.